36 HoUrS oF iNsAniTy

36 HOURS OF INSANITY

This was the End of a painful past, a relation that wrecked me some 5 months back has left scars of solitude over my existence, and each day was passing as I am getting roasted in the hell of fire.
Every dream of my eyes melted and came running over my cheeks, every hope of my own happiness vanished from my face. I started treading in the world of despair where everything became insipid to my existence.
I was with my own concentrating with my work, pushing myself hard to keep myself away from any thought of foreign world, I was within my soul and heart.
No one ever have thought a mistaken message from a mobile will switch your emotion from its helm to heights and then leave you on the brink of another tale of seclusion.
My mentors have never thought their to be future will be too disheartened over the play of life, they shouldn't be either by now, another painful reminiscence added to its feather.

No one can ever say or agree that a 12 hours illusion will reach to a real melody for a moment and when it will clear from the eyes, the eyes will be dampen with the mist.

It was a usual afternoon in the office, he was about to go for lunch, by the time his mobile phone began vibrating, he went to his pocket and bring out his phone, the screen was showing a message received, it wasn’t a surprise either to see a text message, surprise was after that, It was from some unknown number, when he read the text he thought about his friends, may be one of them has changed his number and trying to play a prank with him, he called that number no one picked the call to answer but again after 5 minutes another message came from that number.

Saying,” did you called me, I am having a sour throat, so won’t be able to talk, by that time he was a bit sure in his mind that it’s a game of his friend.

Then he replied,” who is this”? The pitch was a little high to make that side to get angry,

Again the response was quite same but this time the identity was there, “don’t you know how to talk? I am Pooja, if you remember?

He got puzzled, thinking which Pooja.

He asked his colleague for his phone and made the call this time from his number and this time he heard the voice of that lady, a quite an serene voice, he apologized for his previous messages, but the call ended in between as she was a bit feeble in her voice.

It started like this and then it didn’t stop till the midnight of that startling day.

Every message was bringing them closer, there was affection in them with a mixture of care in hard words. He found himself swaying away in those letters, which was dipped in the essence of sincere words of affection. It drove him; he was falling in the deep abyss of Love once again.

But when destiny chooses anyone for its play no human can stand, they have to fall like an autumn leaf on the ground. The feeling was immense, not for a moment he thought it should end, but as the day is envelope by the darkness of night so is everything has to reach to its end.

Dusk looks as the dawn of his life, where things isn’t set but are beginning to accentuate with the calmness of night, when two hearts keep pace with their beats, and it looks as the sound of music to them.

It went on till 1 am. The night was dark; when they ended their conversation it made them feel that there is a beautiful day after this night of romance, when life will sing to them the melody of eternal peace.

With the break of dawn, he went to see his phone and again some messages were waiting for him, then he came to know that she didn’t slept whole night. He woke up at 6:30 and went up to call her, but she didn’t picked the call, then he understood that now she was in the lap of a luxurious sleep.

At 7 he reached to the office it was his usual timing but was feeling weak on his feet, he knew it that viral has attacked him but he didn’t stop there. He started his work, he never made an excuse of his ill health though so many times he have been under such condition, his loneliness has took a toll on his health but his going was still efficient as usual. He finished his work and took a break for coffee and medicine, he was fasting but he knew if he kept on no way he will be going to justify his work in the office, so he broke it that day.

8:30 am his phone again started ringing this was Pooja’s call,

“Good morning! So you have woke up, didn’t you sleep whole night”?

She replied,” Good morning! After such soothing feeling how could I sleep”?

She still wasn’t feeling well but trying to fight hard to start her day and moving to office. They kept on talking till she reached to her Car.

She stopped in the midway in the market to get the medicines, which he asked her to take, he told the chemist over the phone, and then she moved from the place and drove to her office.

“I reached Office jaan” a message came.

He in his worst dreams hasn’t thought about the things, which are coming on the fore, which may change his thinking forever. Whole day passed with the affectionate words and the letters of love dipped in the beautiful feeling of temptation and compassion towards each other. Time was slowly moving towards the evening, an evening that may open the horizons of joys or abyss of darkness to him. He kept on thinking whether to go or not and in his heart those messages has made a ripple in the wave of emotions which by that time reached to its height, if it hasn’t consoled or reached to the arms of his feelings he might have went into the pool of tears.

At 5:45 his friend arrived to his office and they decided to go out somewhere though he was still weak on his legs but he can’t deny him as well, he asked her over the phone to pick him from the place.

He was jacked in running emotions about her, he found himself restless as time was so slow, moving at its pace. His restlessness was at its peak, when she finished her office he was sweating like hell, his phone started ringing again, and he picked it up, she asked him to come but she wasn’t able to get the place and he has to ask her to wait where she was. He took an Auto and ran to see her, the painful hours of separation was about to fly away.

When he reached to the place he started looking everywhere to get a glimpse of her and when he didn’t found he called up, she was some 20 meter away from him in her car, he reached to her with a lazy walk, he found himself weak, he opened the door and got inside and then tightened the seat belt, she gave a look on his face, he was sweating and that made her to take the first move, she extended her hand and reached to his forehead, it was smoldering in fever like an iron is heated in the fire.

She started talking and asked,” shall we go straight to your place as you are not feeling well and fever is taking toll on you,” he denied to accept her point and asked her to drive him somewhere, where they can have a cup of coffee together.

They silently sat and she drove in search of a place where they can sit and talk for sometime, but luck was not with him, they went to In & Out where they can have coffee.

He asked her to have it but she too was not in a good health, her sour throat has made her to deny the coffee. They came out of the place and stood outside near her car, talking and few tender touches with emotion that led them to be together at this hour of night.

He was absolutely under the wings of her care and every moment was ceaseless, time flew like it never came for them.

On the way towards there home he was melting down, he didn’t want the time to go away but there was nothing he can do about that. She left him at his place, standing silently for some moment, he didn’t understood whether she was willing to go or feeling like staying there.

As she drove away from his eyes, he went to light a cigarette and followed the car but in the darkness he didn’t able to find her way, he returned back with a mixed feeling of ecstasy and sadness.

Like every bright day comes a lonely night that leaves a person in to the abyss of horrible dreams and that night was no exception, after a beautiful meeting where two hearts meet to follow the dreams went awry and he was left sulking alone in the darkness of that night. He tried to call her again and again, messaged her again and again but no response brought the comfort to his night. Night followed by another day of anguish when every word came hurting him, making a gorge in his heart.

After two days of pain and despair when he felt life is nothing but another name of miseries, illusions turned into disillusion, he kept on asking and made her to feel the guilt of his pain and distress that she brought to his soul. It might have made her to open her mouth for the first time and the words that came running to him hit him hard and knocked him down. Still he wishes to believe them but confused over this.

Listen Sam,”The day I came after meeting you my mother told me that son of her good friend is coming to see me for marriage, can you imagine how torn I am? I can’t be honest to my feelings for that guy, will be cheating on him and with you I can’t ever think of a future.”

These words came hurting him but he kept himself light in the moment, not to utter a word that would bring pain to her.

He said,” why u didn’t, told me that day only, I would have been pleased to your sincerity towards your parents rather than walking amidst tear in your eyes.”

She became vociferous,” what should I have told you, I was shocked to hear it, I wasn’t able to think anything, my consciousness was no more with me to understand and think anything.”

It brought him a little comfort to his crying soul; he felt it deep and thought she must be true, may be they were never destined to go on.

He felt those words and left he wandering, it might be a proverbial cloud, which dispersed with the first ray of the sun but he still walks in the memory lane of that moment.

A weak now has passed, his sulking eyes still believe to see that face, to meet her once again and to ask her, what it meant to you when you uttered four divine letters “LOVE” and what you felt when you said,”JAAN”.

In the heat of running emotions, he still goes to that place, the petrol pump in the evening to feel the wonderful time he has with her, the fragrance of her are still scattered in the Air, every evening he feels her innocent touch to his forehead which left him dreaming and made him a wanderer.

One can say it was Insanity of the moment, but still I feel it wasn’t Insanity but an emotional upsurge, which left one sulking, and one moving in life to find a beautiful tomorrow.